Some pregnancy thoughts

As I near the very end of this pregnancy I thought I'd jot down some notes (as I wait at one of my final dr. appointments). 

🔹 I'm excited, nervous, at peace, anxious about this little guy come into the world. 

On one hand, I am ready for him to come out: hopefully ending my heartburn, the ability to bend over and get up returning, and seeing who he is and how he blesses our family. 

On the other: sleepless nights, exhaustion, recovering from surgery, the countdown beginning of when I have to return to work, giving Bailey enough attention while caring for a baby are all concerns. 

🔹 this has been a harder pregnancy than my first. I remember thinking, when pregnant with Bailey, "if I could be pregnant forever that would be fine with me!" I felt so good!

This time it's been a bit rougher... Very strong Braxton hicks contractions, a few long lasting colds, all day nausea, back pain, feeling tired all the time, starting maternity leave early because working was taking its toll and just feeling blah. 

I still LOVE feeling him move and the knowledge that my body can create and grow and make a home for this baby to sustain him until he's delivered, but I'm ready for the other symptoms to go away. 

36 weeks!

 

🔹 I do worry about post partum depression, I think I had it for a bit when Bailey was a few months old, but I know I have the support of a lot of people, I just need the courage and awareness to ask for help. I'm pretty sure there was a week or two during this pregnancy where I was depressed: no energy, unable to sleep, feeling like a bad mom already and just overall worn down. 

Thankfully it only lasted a short time and I was able to talk with my Mom and start to feel better. 

🔹 I wonder who this little guy is going to be? Chris thinks he will be the opposite of Bailey - relaxed, quiet and contemplative. Content to watch Bailey and let her run around him. I have no idea and I'm excited to meet him! 

🔹 Bailey and I have been going to our local pool 2 or 3 times a week for toddler time, so she can swim and get worn out with little effort on my part. This week (38 weeks pregnant) I decided to take a picture in my suit before we left the house. So here I am, cellulite and all! 

38 weeks!

 

🔹 I know that our lives are going to be different in both a good and tiring way. I hope that I can find a balance and be the Mom that my kids need me to be.

 

* It's comforting knowing that we have a scheduled date and time to meet him, but the knowledge that he could come early is still in my mind. I feel that he is much bigger than Bailey was (7 lbs 11 oz) and since I've been taking it easier I've only been having a few contractions each day, instead of the all evening super strong ones I had last week.

 

** Those are all the thoughts in my mind for now...I'm sure I have a ton more floating around in there, but for now those are all that I can conjure up.

 

I'm looking forward to sharing our baby boy with you soon!!